Journal Entry 2

Today was a pretty good day I haven't realized how much I missed school until now. Learning is one of my hobbies. I know it sounds kind of weird but once I learn to do something and i grasp the concept. I get butterflies in my stomach like from your first kiss or that feeling when you drop from the top of the roller coaster but you know everything is going to be okay. One of the things that has me a little bothered though is that there was a shooting in my neighborhood last night. If you watch the news I'm sure you have seen it. Things have been ridiculous I pay almost a mortgage payment to live in this two bedroom apartment that I thought oh its a decent area right next to the millenia mall. WRONG WRONG WRONG!!! I moved into this apartment in December 19th. it hasn't even been a month and there have already been 2 shootings and then in the complex subway you have people taking money out of the tip jar. I know the last one not that big of a deal but it is to me. Maybe if I was living here with my friends or by myself I could just brush it under the rug but I'm not I have a wife and a son to think about I feel like I directly put them in harms way by signing the least to this place I am hoping by next year I can save up what little money I have and buy a house. 

Journal Entry#1

Well this is definitely my first blog and I'm a little late doing it. It has been a rough few weeks for me starting school and all. I feel a bit overwhelmed  but I am not one to give up when things get rough but I do get distracted a lot. I have been trying to provide a good life for my family since we became a family and lately it has been hard. I have been trying to get into corrections for the past month and a half that way I could make more money while I go to school to become a Firefighter/Paramedic and save up to buy a house in the next two years. It's always something with me and my dreams are always put to the side. Not this time I thought I am Unstoppable nothing is going to get in my way. I just found out yesterday afternoon while getting my physical to go to corrections academy that I have bradycardia. I basically means I have an extremely slow heart rate and I may need to get a pace maker but until i see a cardiologist they are going to put my medical records on hold. But wait there is more!! I don't have health insurance because I just got out of the Marine Corps and I was trying to get this job so I could afford health insurance for my family and myself. So with that said it is going to cost me hundreds of dollars I don't have to maybe find out if they can continue my application process. But that is not all as if my dreams haven't been folding over and crashing down on themselves I just realized that if I don't get the clearance I need from the cardiologist then I can't become a Firefighter/Paramedic like I have dreamed of becoming since I was a kid. I had it all planned out when I graduated high school. Live on my own and get a few jobs for work experience, join the military to serve my country and show my dedication to service. Finally I get out of the Marine Corps and try to apply to become a Firefighter I don't even get to see an application because now they want 2 years college experience. So I go to school now no big deal and then I find this out and I feel like the past ten years of my life has been a big waste of time and I don't know what to do. My Definition of the Unknown was Anxious because there is so much I am worried about and so many questions I need answered I hope it gets better. Sorry if my first blog is a little drama filled but it felt good to get it off my chest. Journal Entry1